The Death Throes of Summer

Well, folks, today I write with the vivid awareness that I am witnessing the death throes of the summer of my 30th birthday. I am stricken with a contemplative, yet melancholic perspective as I realize that yet another summer has come and gone (almost), although I feel it just began yesterday. Even when I speak to my son (who is vacationing up north with my parents) on the phone, it is no longer like talking to a young boy...it is almost a man's voice I hear talking back. It's quite surreal. It's only been 2 months, but there are things that feel like they have occurred over the span of years. Yet I am still here with the underlying sensation that I have not moved from this computer chair and that I remain untouched and unchanged. How is it possible that time can speed by so fast while appearing so ultimately frozen and stuck at the same time? French novelist Alphonse Karr, who is responsible for the famous quote "the more things change, the more they remain the same" was obviously quite familiar with this experience.

All in all, it has been a fairly adventurous time, with more of a variety of experiences than most summers. I went to places I've never been before (albeit locally), attended festivals, tried food I'd never eaten, made some new friends while still managing to find time for some valued old friends, tried some new concepts on for size, and of course...partied with a vengeance. I do feel that I've given due respect to the milestone 30th birthday.

Fall is always a time of evaluation and transformation for me, and a time when certain things begin and others come to an end. There is always a certain degree of anxiety present in the birth or death of anything, and the fall epitomizes this, especially in my own head. It is in the fall that I have always instinctively felt the need to begin new things and to finish old projects, to make the preparations for a more introverted phase, and to be reborn after discarding illusions that are not useful or are seemingly meaningless. The approach of fall puts the first chill on the intensity of the summer, and seems to encourage a purge of sorts; one that gives the capacity to gain new strength for the impending harshness of winter. However, as much as I dread the change of seasons, I know that the anticipation is always the worst part, and that once I have settled somewhat comfortably I can really appreciate the beauty in the solitary decadence of the autumn months.

On a brighter note, I do have 2 things coming up to help wind down the summer this year. Firstly, not long after my son gets home, the Western Fair will begin, and Jordan is at the age where he can come with me on any ride (and usually convinces me to go on the ones that leave me shaking for a half hour after I get off). So that should be nicely adrenaline filled, and the Western Fair is always something I look forward to doing with my son.

Secondly, on September 23rd, I will be able to cross another thing off The List....my brother and I managed to get tickets to SEE TOOL IN TORONTO!!!!!!!! Some people are coming down from Ottawa to go as well, so it should be a good time. No matter how it turns out, it will be worth it just to catch a glimpse of the elusive Maynard.

Well, thats all for now, but in parting I shall leave you with a few scenes from this summer:

sunset

wormhole created by a spider

another beautiful skyscape

decadence

the moon and the darkness